Laid Off.

I got laid off from my job yesterday. Specifically, three of us got laid off. My initial reaction was of course, shock and disbelief. And crying. Oh, there were tears. We were told there would be "restructuring of the marketing and sales departments" and we were no longer included in that restructuring. After I gathered myself, I got mad. I was livid. I've been at that job for 14 months and I've given it every bit of hard work I could. And it just wasn't good enough. But the fact is, some people are giving 5, 10, 20 years of their lives to companies that can no longer afford to keep them, either. So I threw my stuff in a box, talked to HR about severance and unemployment, and walked out without a second glance.

I was still in shock when I got home. And I was pretty bitter. But the more I thought about it, the more relieved I am about the whole thing. Here's a secret: I hated my job. I felt ignored, underappreciated, disrespected. I was a number there and no matter how hard I worked, it was never going to be good enough. Yesterday was the first time my boss had said more than 3 words to me in almost a month, so it makes me think that he's had this planned for quite some time. I understand that employers have to do unpleasant things in order to keep their company afloat.

I feel I'm being an adult about the whole thing. I didn't scream or fall apart (I mean, I cried, but I didn't make a scene.), I didn't try to storm back into his office and give him a few choice opinions of what I thought about the whole situation. And when I handed in my key, picked up my box, and walked out the door, the tension melted off my shoulders. I don't feel the weight of the world on them anymore. I mean, I'm a little nervous, but I know how to be smart about my finances, both now and for the future. In the meantime, I'm spending my non-working time going to the gym (where I don't have to fight anyone for a treadmill), hanging out with the friends that are around (B and I already got our licenses together and had breakfast this morning, and T wants me to come over later to complain together), spend lots of time with Fisher outside and at the dog park (he's already thrilled that he's not crated all day), and maybe work on some of my goals I laid out for my birthday, like learning new recipes and practicing Photoshop. So I'm looking on the bright side, taking advantage of the downtime, and getting back to basics. It's going to be okay. And in the meantime...if anyone needs a hard-working, sarcastic, entertaining marketing/photographer/writer type person, you should contact me!
Persevering,
LC.